The ridiculous tragedy of a protector
by Twisteria Lullubee
Summary: I knew him before he got the ring... When things were so much simpler. I won't let anyone take him away from me.  I started out bad, but it only got worse, he touched me... He became obsessed. He will never let me go. OC Warnings inside.
1. Chapter 1

rape, abuse, attempted suicide. Murder, mention of prostitution. Cross dressing, boy on boy in some scenes. rated for later chapters.

RyoXBakura, RyoXOC, TouzokoXOC, light AtemuXOC and BakuraXOC odd splash of OdionXMarik in there somewhere.

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><p><strong>The ridiculous tragedy of a protector...<strong>

I wasn't always a protector... I preferred solitude over the company of any of the people I knew. My drunk mother, her drunken friends and the assholes at school were all I had to judge humanity. A little boy changed that... But then he died, and I no longer even had the drunkards to keep me company. I was alone for years after that, trapped by the lies my family had told.

When I was free I went to England with my uncle, he was a mortician there, but even he was ashamed of me and looked down on me with disdain. The dead were all I found solace in.

I would spend hours in the morgue, talking to freshly prepared corpses. If they could speak, they could tell my life story, however; their faces were almost always peaceful, gentle. The couldn't judge me, they couldn't hate me... They were the ideal. I found peace in talking to them, even if the behavior only drove the living farther away.

That's what I believed, however, another little boy would soon prove me wrong... Well, I suppose he was more of the exception that proved the rule.

I was talking to a corpse, one of a small girl dressed in pink, laid in a soft, silk lined casket, rose petals scattered about her. To be honest, I don't even remember what I was saying to her.

I was deep in conversation when I heard a small voice behind me, "Did you know my sister?"

I practically jumped out of my skin, it was safe to say I wasn't expecting a response. I turned, seeing a small boy behind me, "I'm sorry," I stammered out, "I didn't really know her... I just..."

"-Wanted someone to talk to?" the small albino finished the thought I had been unable to complete, with a soft, accepting smile. His British accent made the words sound even gentler, "It's okay, I'm glad you're giving her someone to talk to..."

Okay, so he was just as creepy as me.

The boy looked over at his sister, his eyes were watering, "She looks so peaceful... Almost as if she were asleep." he whispered.

I felt bad, like I had over stepped my boundaries by just speaking to the girl. I wanted to offer him some sort of comfort, "You really did love her, didn't you?"  
>"I still love her, I would give anything for her... Even if she can't give back." said the boy, placing his hand on her cheek.<p>

"I'm sure she knew that," I said, coming closer, "When I was her age, I would have given everything I had to be so loved."

"Surely someone-"

I shook my head, "No, but that's okay," I smiled, the boy kind of stared at me with those big chocolate orbs, "I found my own way. I never needed anyone else."

The boy smiled a little wryly and looked back at his sister, "I've failed to introduce myself, my name is Bakura, Ryo."

"Ke-" I shook my head violently, "My name is Kairi, call me Kairi."

"Kairi," he said with a smile, "that's an unusual name for a guy."

"I'm not a guy."

Ryo fell over with shock and embarrassment, "I-I'm sorry! I didn't know!"

I only laughed, making a gesture of dismissal with my hand, "That's alright, I get it all the time."

He calmed down a little, "Well, Kairi," he said after her stood up and dusted himself off,"Would you mind if I joined you?"

I shook my head.

We talked for hours about nothing in particular. He was so sweet and innocent. I spent the whole time trying to get him to either laugh smile or just look, all were angelic. We talked about his father's archeology and the fact that he wouldn't be in attendance of this funeral. It saddened Ryo a bit, I offered to walk him home after the funeral. The funeral was depressing as all funerals are, I myself wasn't an actual attendant either, but I watched it from my window. I saw Ryo burst into tears and throw himself on his sister's coffin, "Don't leave me! Don't leave me!" he sobbed, the other attendants and officials grabbing him and pulling him off. He collapsed into the grass and sobbed into his hands as they lowered the coffin into the plot. Everyone ignored him in their own grief.

I couldn't take it anymore, I ran over to him. Hugged him close, "She's not gone, she isn't leaving you, not as long as you always remember her. She'll always be with you... It will just be like she left for school." It started to rain, all the others pulled out there umbrellas, but not us.

He hugged me back, "I can't live without her," he whispered, sobbing into my chest.

"You don't have to."

We stayed like that for hours, long after all the others had left, by then the rain had stopped but we were both soaked. Ryo no longer had no tears to shed, he started to stand up, and I let him.

I walked him home, staring into those sad eyes the whole time. I couldn't help but blush when he wrapped his arms around my own

In all honesty, when he said good night to me and closed the front door I believed that would be the end of it. He had said he would come back, but I didn't believe him. I would bring back bad memories. Despite all odds, he proved me wrong again, he came back to visit me the very next day. We talked some and were close friends for a long time after that... It even got to the point where I wasn't relying on the acceptance of the dead.

Then it happened. His father died, leaving him the millennium ring.

We became more and more distant after that. He avoided me, ran away from me. It got worse and worse with every day that passed. Until he left completely, he went to Japan.

When my own uncle died that was the end of my own family- my real family anyway. I went to Japan myself, not to look for him or anything, but I was after someone. I don't want to get into that.

I was down in Domino city park, staring into the water over the bridge I was standing on, I had had no luck finding a lead. I was sulking.

Suddenly, I saw a white haired boy out of the corner of my eye, running down the road. I bolted around, I saw deep chocolate eyes, a striped shirt.

"Ryo?" I went after him, when I caught up, I saw that he was in the middle of a duel.

He played ruthlessly, and as I watched him my stomach churned.

"You'll have to do better then that," he growled as he activated his trap card. His voice was as cruel as his eyes.

Was that really Ryo? He was... so different.. When he beat them I saw him force them to give him the cards they got from the Kiba tournament.. He left them on the cold concrete, groaning. He chuckled.

He was too different, that wasn't Ryo, not _my _Ryo.

It was a couple months later when I saw him again, he was running down the streets of Domino city the same as before. But this time was different, there was fear on his face, and it was a gentle one. I grabbed him by his arm as he rushed by me, pulling him against my chest.

"Please, wait." he begged softly, tears on his face.

"Ryo, it's me." I said just as softly, wiping them away.

He opened his beautiful chocolate orbs and looked up at me, his voice was totally shocked, "Kairi?"

I nodded, letting him pull away a little, "Do you have some time to talk? Let me buy you a cup of coffee."

"This is sort of a bad time..." he said nervously, wiping a bead of sweat off his forehead.

"Please, Ryo. It's been such a long time since I last spoke with you."

"Later."

"Now, please."

He sighed in submission, "Alright, but I can't stay too long."

I lead him to a cheep, outdoor cafe. I had probably given this place thousands over the past month or so.

We sat down together, he was shaking the whole time.

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

"What makes you think something is wrong?" he asked with a shaky smile, spilling some coffee onto his chest as lifted the cup.

Instinctively, I grabbed the cup and lowered it, "That's what, Ryo," I picked a napkin up and began to wipe off his chest, "I'm worried about you. I didn't tell you this before, last time I saw you you did some things... Some bad things. Why?"

Ryo's eyes widened, then he bowed his head, "I can't tell you." he whispered.

"You can trust me."

"I know, the person I can't trust is myself." he closed his eyes.

"I trust you..." I said softly, absentmindedly stroking those soft white locks.

"I destroy everything I get close to." he said, a tear slowly making it's way down his face, "I don't deserve your trust."

"I'm willing to take that risk, Ryo," without thinking, I planted a gentle kiss on his lips, running my tongue along his upper lip. For a moment he was shocked, but soon melted into the kiss, opening his mouth and kissing back. I ran my hands gently up and down his coffee dampened torso. He moaned. Then out of no where, his eyes shot open and he screamed. He jerked back out of his chair breaking the kiss as he fell back. I tried to help him up but he screamed again.

"DON'T TOUCH ME! NEVER TOUCH ME!" he shouted with tears on his face and fear in his eyes as he picked himself up and ran away.

I stood there..._ Ryo._ I ran after him.

I was going to find him, I needed to find out what was wrong, I needed to apologize for what I did.

"I'm so sorry."

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	2. Chapter 2

Ryo POV

I ran away, as fast as my legs could carry me. But as fast and as far as I ran I every step I took only brought me closer to him. No matter where you go you can't escape the voice in your head.

_Ryo! HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO ME! I've been with you for years, and you just go and cheat on me with the first bitch who offers!_

There were still tears on my face, as hard as I tried I just couldn't stop crying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

_You'll be really sorry when you get back home! I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!_

"Please don't hurt me, Bakura, I'm sorry..." I whispered as more tears fell.

_Alright, I can just kill your little bitch._

My eyes widened, "Please, Bakura, anything but that.. She doesn't know... She just wanted to kiss me-"

_AHHHHH! _I heard a furious growl from in my head, _Don't you ever mention that kiss again! Are you really that fucking HORNY?! Her kiss got you hard, don't deny it, you fucking little slut! You call that a kiss? By the time I'm done with you that will be nothing._

I couldn't argue anymore, more tears flowed.

I cried all the way into my apartment, I locked the door behind me. Silently praying that Kairi had abandoned me, silently praying that she would burst in any moment.

_Ryo... why do you always make me do this to you? _Even though the voice was softer now, I could still tell he was angry. I felt a cold hand ghost over my throat, _You never fight... Get undressed._

"Bakura, please let me explain..." I plead. I knew he wouldn't listen... it was all I knew to do.

_Don't make me do it for you._

I took a deep, scared breath and started to pull off my shirt. I felt hand gliding over my back, coercing, driving, forcing, scaring the hell out of me.

Nails suddenly raked down my back, I screamed.

_I want total silence, land lord. _ His nails dug deeply into the flesh between my shoulder blades, it burned. I felt tears prick my eyelashes and my lip quivered, hiding the whimper I knew would only anger him. I felt hands push roughly into my pants, searing hot marks into my hips as he pulled me back against him.

There was no point... No point... No point to fighting him, to resisting him. He was all I had, the only one that always came back, no matter how much I wanted him to go away.  
>I brought my leg up and took off my shoes then pushed my pants down slowly, like I knew he wanted me to. I was trembling hard.<p>

_You're such a dainty thing, landlord... _I could feel his predatory grin as his lips ghosted over the flesh of my neck, unusually sharp canines peeking out and running over my skin. I shivered.

_So easy you would be to break. _He ripped my boxers, the fabric stretching painfully against my most sensitive parts, taking skin off my inner thighs. I couldn't hold back anymore.

_I screamed._

He smacked my butt with more force than usual, leaving burning marks I knew would make it hurt to sit, _What part of _silence _didn't you get, landlord?_

I cried silently, I knew what he was about to do.

_I'm going to make it so you won't dare sit down for a week._

I had to force myself not to whimper.

How could he do this? He'd been doing it for so long now and it still didn't make any sense. I was his host, we-we shared a body. In a way, we were the same person. That meant he was me... and I was about to rape myself.

I heard a near demonic laugh behind me and I remembered he could hear my thoughts, _We are not the same, you are weak and pathetic. Why do you even bother with those little people you call your friends?None of them would ever care about you again if they ever realized how contaminated you really are. What a vile little slut you are. Especially that girl.._

I didn't bother to say a word in my defense, it would only make my situation worse and I knew deep down that even I wouldn't truly believe the words. I never should have allowed her to kiss me.

Bakura grabbed my hips.

I closed my eyes and braced myself.

"RYO! _RYO! _Are you in there?!" my eyes flashed open as I heard a banging on the door, "It's me, Kairi! Open up!"

"_Kair...Kairi?_" I said weakly. I looked at the door, but that wasn't where the banging was coming from. It was the window.

_Ignore her, Ryo. Don't let her in._

I nodded gently, clamping my eyes shut as we were about to proceed as usual.

"RYO! I heard a_ scream_! If you don't let me in, I swear to god I WILL break this this window!"

Bakura snarled in frustration, _Put some fucking clothes on and let the little skank it, once she gets the hint she'll leave. Just like everyone else in you pathetic life._

"Give me a second Kairi." I said, barely any stronger than before.

I got dressed shakily and ran my fingers through my hair to smooth it out before going over to the window and unlocking it.

"How did you even-"

She smiled, "Fire escape, may I come in?"

"Oh! Sure," I moved out of the way as she swung her leg over the sill

_You'll be lucky if I don't kill this little bitch._

I swallowed.

"Wh-why are you here?" I asked her.

"I came to say that I'm sorry. I really shouldn't have done that..." she took a deep breath, wincing, "I always screw everything up. Were friends... I hope we can just forget it ever happened. Please forgive me."

My laugh bordered on hysteria, nerves, "Yo-you don't have to apologize to me, Kairi. You didn't force yourself on me, I-I kissed back." I could hear Bakura screaming in my mind but I ignored him. I-I didn't want to hurt Kairi, but I would have to if I wanted to save her life.

"Then are you so freaked out?"

I said the first thing that came to my mind, "I-I was mugged." I realized quickly how stupid that sounded, I got here within minutes.

"Are you hurt?" she came over to me, looking over my body for bruises and lacerations. There was no way I was going to let her see the claw marks on my butt and hips.

"N-not bad, just shaken mostly." I said with what I hoped was a convincing smile.

She reached out, as if to pull me into her arms but seemed to think better of it, looking down, "I'm glad." she went over to the counter, taking from it a napkin from and pen, "What can you remember? What did there faces looked like? Did they have any distinctive tattoos?"

My face fell and suddenly I felt nausea in the pit of my stomach. She really believed my ridiculous story? She trusted me that much? No- no one ever just took me at my word, and I was lying. I was lying to my best friend. A girl who had chased after me when I had given her no reason to care whether I lived or died. She shouldn't.

_No one ever should._

Before I could calm myself I started to cry, my whole body beginning to shake.

She ran over to me, "No, Ryo! Please don't cry! I feel terrible."

The voice inside my head was screaming at me, telling me to make her leave. I knew I was being selfish but I didn't want her to go. I didn't want to be alone with my demons. I wanted her to stay.

_If you don't kick her out I'll slit her throat, Ryo._

I sobbed hard, I couldn't be selfish, "G-get out." I said shakily, almost testing the words.

She seemed shocked, "What?"

"Ge-get out of my apartment. I don't want to see you here again." I repeated the words, cementing them.

"Ryo, I-"

"I don't want to hear it!" I yelled, grabbing her by her wrist. For a strong woman, she was surprisingly easy to lead. I pulled her to the door. I was mad at myself, not her, but I needed to get her out of here.

"Ryo-"

"Please just leave." I whispered.

"Take this," before I had time to protest, she shoved the napkin into my hands, "it's my address. I'll be there if you need me. 'Bye, Ryo." with a look of hurt concealed behind her harsh features, she walked away.

I slid to my knees. I felt like I was going to puke.

_That's my sweet landlord._

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